It
comes as no revelation to adherents of the true spirit
of croquet that the sport has attained an unprecedented
level of stuffiness. What was once a game to be enjoyed
universally is now a highly codified, ritualistic farce.
The croquet spectator need travel but a bit further than
his or her own backyard to observe examples of this phenomenon,
for it is the same backyard which serves as the last bastion
of spirited croquet.
When
the garden sets are wiped clean after a morning of wickets,
the only place to find any semblance of croquet play is
at an exclusive club. And it is here that croquet is grappled,
held by the neck and wrung until every ounce of its spirit
and vitality expire like so much milk left uncapped, on
the front porch of my or your home.
Phooka
is determined to combat each and every misconception of
the fine and true sport of croquet, and will continue to
do so in a series of articles of original intention and
also in commentaries on previously published literature.
This season, we reprint a segment from Charlton and Thompson's
supposed end-all tome, Croquet. The article enumerates
the pieces of clothing fit for men and women in the sport.
Quite erroneously, Charlton and Thompson have left out key
aspects of the proper wicketer's outfit. In my reply, printed
directly after the offending article, I point out omissions
as specific as the navigational tools needed for overland
croquet, and also obviously overlooked items such as the
hip flask, which improves endurance and morale.
Yours
sincerely,
Reginald Bakeley
President, Team Wales
Croquet
Dress
by James Charlton and Wm. Thompson
A
Counter-Viewpoint
by Reginald Bakeley
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